Heavenly Hindsight

Nothing puts life in perspective like death. Each of us has a predestined appointment to die once. No matter who we are, what we’ve done or how much we’re worth, we will die, and there is no escaping it.  How we live on this side will determine which side of eternity we wake up into. How we live on this side will determine whether we are in fact resting in “peace” or eternal damnation.

On Wednesday, January 25th at 12:25PM, my dear grandmother went to sleep and woke up in the presence of the Lord, no doubt about it.  Her faith was secure decades ago, but she kept on running her race, walking out her salvation with fear and trembling.  Everyone, and I mean everyone, she encountered could see her love for Christ.

As humans, emotional beings, we tend to mourn the loss of a loved one because we remember the times we’ve shared and imagine how life will be going forward without this person who played a role in our life.  And that’s okay, there’s a time for that.  Yet, we do not mourn as the unbelievers that have no hope.  For we know as real as death is, Heaven is real too.

Each time I begin to sorrowfully mourn my grandma's death, I have to check myself: “don’t you believe Heaven is real?” “Wasn’t she unquestionably saved?” (or as my brother called her a “professional Christian”) Then, I must know that now that she is absent from her body, she is present with the Lord.

"To the unbeliever, their last day on earth is the worst day of their life. To the believer, their last day on earth is the best day of their life." January 25, 2012, was the best day of my grandma's life, just short of a year after my grandfather was called home. Therefore, it is a celebration!

In the last couple weeks, several people I know have become bereaved.  Today, I attended my friend’s father’s funeral. And I’d never really refer to a funeral as a “good” funeral but that was a good funeral/homegoing celebration.  I left this funeral uplifted and encouraged by his life and legacy.  This home going ceremony, coupled with the things people have been saying in honor of my grandma, as well as the fact that we are  pilgrims, passing through this vapor of a life, motivate me more, to live with my eyes on Heaven.

The question before me now and henceforth is: What will I say when I get to Heaven?  I’m just thinking of that video of my life that will play with the choices I made and the choices I am making. For example, imagine, how embarrassing it will be for me to try to explain an offense I held in my heart (or something else sinful). When I’m at the judgment seat of Christ, accounting for everything I’ve said, done, or thought, how will I explain all my choices to my Father? If the opportunity presents itself, which I'd imagine it could, since we'll be there forever: what will I say to my brother or sister in Christ?  "Oh yeah that time….yeah I was mad because….and yeah that was it. *blank stare* Yeah, it seems really lame and petty, I don’t even know how I could let that affect me. I wish I handled that differently. Thank God He let me in, even after that. So, yeah....” *awkward* Mercy me.

Philippians 3: 18-20 --actually read the whole chapter, letter, testament, etc. for context :)
For many walk, of whom I have told you often, and now tell you even weeping, that they are the enemies of the cross of Christ: whose end is destruction, whose god is their belly, and whose glory is in their shame—who set their mind on earthly things. For our citizenship is in heaven, from which we also eagerly wait for the Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ

We get caught up in all these trivial things of the world that will have no value in the age to come.  I want to live my life with a Heavenly Hindsight. I will (try to) live my life with a Heavenly Hindsight, daily. Grace, Lord.

"So I won't lose heart on this journey, in this vapor called life."

you *are in* my prayers

freely He gives and freely He takes away.

When someone closer along the degree of separation goes on to be with the LORD, I think about the people directly affected. I really consider the younger ones. There's a line between the appropriate time to call or visit to offer condolences, and the sign of respect you show by allowing the family to have their private time. I know this because these situations make me flashback to my uncle and my cousins last year. Out of respect I'd want to call right away to console my friends, but at the same time, I know it will not be the best time for them to talk, only to repeat a similar interview. I still try to ascertain the best time to cross that line. I'd imagine it's much worse to never cross the line and failing to call.

At the appropriate time, people tend to say "you're in my prayers." Earlier this year, a friend's mother mother also went to be with the LORD, and I still wonder how much weight those words carried to her when she reunited with many people who had lost touch with her over the years. More importantly, do people really mean that when they say it. I hope so. Needless to say, she is in my prayers and today I'll add another friend to that prayer.

I remember when Pastor Bimbo Odukoya was killed in a plane accident in Nigeria in 2005. I just met her youngest daughter that summer, on a trip to Great America. She was probably about 15. We were told that as soon as the family learned of the fatal crash, they immediately began praying. To my understanding, they were praising and worshiping God for her life. When I would assume they would be mourning, and wondering how her teenage daughters would process not having their mother around for the rest of their life, their faith was so strong that they were praising God. That in and of itself was powerful to me and I will never forget that.

More times than not, death seems so unexpected, so unplanned, to us. We would like to think that God-fearing parents would get to live to their old age and see their childrens' children. Then once they get to their elderly age they would go on to be with the LORD. But whose plan is that? It just reinforces that He is in control. God knew everything that would happen up until our last day on this earth.

Although it is very shocking, we can't press pause to figure everything out or anticipate what's next. We will never know His ways completely. We can't press pause but we can press pray. It's more than an appropriate statement to say -- it's an action. The best thing to do is pray and continue praying.  I would venture to say the words do not mean as much, but the actions will, regardless if they have actual knowledge of it or not. So it goes without saying, but I guess it's the only thing you can say at a time like this. We just have to do it.

Blessed be the name of The LORD. 

My heart will chose to say, LORD, blessed be Your name.

Praying that God would comfort and strengthen a family of friends, as they mourn the loss of their mother, aunt, wife, and sister.

*sigh*

cherish the earthly relationships, on earth

I don't believe in living each day like it's your last . . .

I heard a Pastor say this week that marriage does not exist in Heaven. It is a question I had, which he confirmed, since my stepfather remarried my mother after my older siblings' mother passed, many years ago. My stepfather has also gone home to be with the Lord (Rest in Perfect Peace). Yet, I vividly remember the words my mother said to him with the casket open and how the Pastor responded to her. I could not help but wonder privately, who would he be married to in Heaven? And how does marriage in Heaven work for the polygamous homes, which were still popular in Nigeria as recent as two generations ago – my grandparent’s generation.

Thoughts of people that have recently passed and celebrating the anniversary of my esteemed relative’s home going (Dr. Femi Ogunnaike), as is the cultural tradition, caused other thoughts to resurface. When we attend funerals, usually as Christians, we comfort ourselves with the assurance that we will see them again. My initial reaction to the Pastor's affirmation, that the marriage relationship did not exist in Heaven, was something like "oh" *eyebrows raised* and "aww." The reassurance we hold onto likely encompasses the hope that we will see that person" again assumedly in the same earthly relationship. However, if the marriage relationship does not exist in heaven, neither will all other earthly relationships that we value. This makes me realize this one chance on earth is really the only time to cherish that form of the relationship.

Along those lines, I usually hear so many of my peers say “live each day like it's your last,” when they learn of someone’s passing. Many people probably said this same statement 9 years ago too, wherever we were, when we processed the World Trade Center’s terrorist attack.

Respectfully, I disagree wholeheartedly with the “live each day like your last” motto. I know I haven’t put much thought into my last day and how I want to spend it and I do not think I ever will. I would venture to say that many people who say that have not put much thought into it either. We generally work with the end in sight, but this is an expected end (for some - since not all will sleep) that we naturally and consciously suppress. Moreover, the average life expectancy in the United States is currently at about 78 years. Adhering to that motto essentially means we would spend, on average, a very substantial portion of our lifetime on earth, living in fear of life and death.

I do believe in living each day progressively and with purpose. The more correct statement or motto to me falls somewhere along the lines of “live each day cherishing all the time spent with people, family and friends with no doubt in your mind that if it were your last day once you've arrived at the gates of Heaven, God would say “my good and faithful servant you’ve done well.””

Where are we?

We left home early, so that just in case we hit traffic, we would still get there on time.

We were prepared.

Many of us were eager to enter on time. We, of course, also got the good parking spots.

While others are fashionably (or tactlessly -- whichever your perspective) late.

But better late than never, right? At least they made it!

Alas, everyone is here.

We see some familiar faces, some new.

Beautiful People, smelling good, looking good, brought their best foot forward.

Some dressed to impress.

Some came just for/as eye candy . . . (oftentimes referred to as spectators).

Some just came as they were, didn’t put much effort into their appearance.

Music is playing and it’s good music.

We like the music; the rhythm, the melody, the words.

We even sing along because we know all the words (or almost).

We’re dancing to the music, some people even break a sweat!

At times we start dancing with or near other people around us.

We are just so happy to be here, having a good old time.

People’s hands are lifted, stomping our feet, stepping to the music, clapping.

To be frank, we are glorifying the songs subject . . . because we can relate to it . . . or just because.

Smiling, Laughing, Merry, and Jolly.

We might consume something, we might not.

We might leave in the same way or state we came, we may not.

Lastly, we know we will probably drop some dollars when it’s all said and done. It's expected here, so we're okay with that. We're following the code of conduct, the rules.

Hours have passed but it’s like we don’t want it to end, ever.

A little saddened when it inevitably comes to an end, but we already know the next time we will be back.

We had a good time.

Where are we?

When this life ends, where were we and what were we doing?

To be continued…

A purpose driven life = a life fulfilled

What a week... Church, Market, Bowling Alley, Nursing home, Illinois Department of Corrections, Courthouse, Community Service Kickoff, International Potluck, Celebrations oh yeah and school...

Monday went to see my grandfather, before heading back to school, and now the end of the week, his junior brother has been laid to rest in Odogbolu, Ogun, next to my great grandmother.

From his youngest son, my cousin JO.

A great man...a loving father, a wonderful, gifted and brilliant doctor, dermatologist, and venereologist...someone who stood for integrity, hard work, and perfection...may I be half if not all that u were...loved u, love u, and will always love u dad..rest in peace.....

There is a time for everything and it is time to celebrate my granduncle. A great man indeed. Love always, Funmi. A life fulfilled.

For me to live is Christ - Paul

If my time to go back comes before Christ comes back I want you to know that I love you. We do not say that a lot or enough in our affection-lacking-culture. We just assume the other people in our lives know. But people come and go at different times and then people think "I wish I told X, xyz,"  when that person has been called back.

Heard on the radio though, "when someone tells you 'I love you,' you should ask 'what do you mean by that?'" It could have different in-depth meanings depending on the recipient. If you really want to know you can ask me =). But generally, just know that I love you with the love of the Lord and want what's best for you, as a friend God has placed in my life.

So I just encourage you to break away from that culture and tell people how you feel about them often.

At the same time, make sure you are doing your part daily to fulfill your destiny and purpose.


I got this from my friend, JW's status and would like to share: 

My favorite store is in Nazareth, My clothes are in Nazareth, My food is in Nazareth, my car is in Nazareth, My books are in Nazareth. My COMFORT is in Nazareth. All I know, is in Nazareth. In order to fulfill scripture, I have to leave Nazareth. My destiny is in Bethlehem, but my comfort zone is in Nazareth. I have to leave Nazareth and go to Bethlehem I have to.

Bethlehem or bust. Let's go!

Lastly, if God has placed someone anyone in your life, it is your duty to at least plant a seed in their life so that when they are called back you know you did your part with them. Reinforced by my Gma.

I don't think I'll be going anywhere for a while though. I'm still learning and a work in progress. Moreover, I've still got business to do. My Father's business. I mustn't leave until it's finished.

Then I'd have lived my life to the fullest.

My wonderful uncle.

There is a time for everything. . . Ecclesiastes 3.

Sunday morning my Grand Uncle went to meet his Maker, Our Lord and Savior. He was a wonderful man and the reason why I enjoy going back to Nigeria every time.

He came on a Sunday, left on a Sunday, and did a lot of Great things in between. A wonderful family man with a great loving wife and 5 wonderful children. He was a husband, uncle, brother, cousin, friend, doctor, and the list goes on.

I take comfort in knowing he was a God fearing born again man.

It is time to celebrate my grand uncle. 71 years old. May you Rest in Perfect Peace Amen. Love Always - Funmi.