cherish the earthly relationships, on earth

I don't believe in living each day like it's your last . . .

I heard a Pastor say this week that marriage does not exist in Heaven. It is a question I had, which he confirmed, since my stepfather remarried my mother after my older siblings' mother passed, many years ago. My stepfather has also gone home to be with the Lord (Rest in Perfect Peace). Yet, I vividly remember the words my mother said to him with the casket open and how the Pastor responded to her. I could not help but wonder privately, who would he be married to in Heaven? And how does marriage in Heaven work for the polygamous homes, which were still popular in Nigeria as recent as two generations ago – my grandparent’s generation.

Thoughts of people that have recently passed and celebrating the anniversary of my esteemed relative’s home going (Dr. Femi Ogunnaike), as is the cultural tradition, caused other thoughts to resurface. When we attend funerals, usually as Christians, we comfort ourselves with the assurance that we will see them again. My initial reaction to the Pastor's affirmation, that the marriage relationship did not exist in Heaven, was something like "oh" *eyebrows raised* and "aww." The reassurance we hold onto likely encompasses the hope that we will see that person" again assumedly in the same earthly relationship. However, if the marriage relationship does not exist in heaven, neither will all other earthly relationships that we value. This makes me realize this one chance on earth is really the only time to cherish that form of the relationship.

Along those lines, I usually hear so many of my peers say “live each day like it's your last,” when they learn of someone’s passing. Many people probably said this same statement 9 years ago too, wherever we were, when we processed the World Trade Center’s terrorist attack.

Respectfully, I disagree wholeheartedly with the “live each day like your last” motto. I know I haven’t put much thought into my last day and how I want to spend it and I do not think I ever will. I would venture to say that many people who say that have not put much thought into it either. We generally work with the end in sight, but this is an expected end (for some - since not all will sleep) that we naturally and consciously suppress. Moreover, the average life expectancy in the United States is currently at about 78 years. Adhering to that motto essentially means we would spend, on average, a very substantial portion of our lifetime on earth, living in fear of life and death.

I do believe in living each day progressively and with purpose. The more correct statement or motto to me falls somewhere along the lines of “live each day cherishing all the time spent with people, family and friends with no doubt in your mind that if it were your last day once you've arrived at the gates of Heaven, God would say “my good and faithful servant you’ve done well.””

Part 2: The Discussion re: Bizzle Track

The following post is collection of responses to the listening? blog posted last week regarding the track by Bizzle using the Ether instrumental referencing rap artists Jay-Z, Rick Ross, and Nas.

General Thoughts:

This is really good. I’ve watched a couple of videos about the whole free mason thing -Ademide W.

I like the track, its got a lot of things I can agree with. –Andrew P.

I thought the flow was nice. -Akua A.

Dang, that was hot, especially after the beat went off. A lot of the stuff he said I know about and have been studying it too. That free mason stuff is crazy and very deep. I would encourage you to read about it but read with caution. There's a lot of crazy stuff out there like the free masons, five percenters etc. –Jerry B.

This is one of those in person conversations but the one main thought that keeps resonating is knowledge is a very powerful thing. This guy might be trying to do the right thing by putting out this video and song. At the same time, a person can be opened up to a side that they never knew existed and now they begin to dig and start going to the "other" side. There is just sooo much that goes into all this. You have to be careful who you give knowledge to because with knowledge comes power and with power comes responsibility. Sometimes I feel like it is better not to know because the other side doesn't gain an advantage either....... (I have so many more thoughts)... –Segun O.

Listened to the track. I see where Bizzle's head is, and it’s a good place. No questions asked. -Eugene U.

As for Bizzle, I don't know what to say about him. It bothers me that he used the word, nigga. I mean, if you wouldn't use the word in church then why use it in a song and say its gospel or Christian rap? And when I think of Christian music, I think of music that glorifies God and praises and worships God. This song does not do this in my opinion. I don't think I would listen to it, but that's just me. –Kimberly G.

Bizzle perfect track to go in on someone lol loved it! –Adebunmi A.

Man this video and flow is insane! All those hidden messages that people wouldn’t even know... this dude is sic (in a good way) and deep. -Daniel O.

Inspiring...I'm all for anything that reveals what is true. -Tolu A.

This video/song came at the right time since I’m currently looking into all kinds of secular music even the so-called “fun music” (– Yinka S.) and “positive music.” I recently had the conviction to eliminate secular tunes altogether from my music selection despite the artists’ musical ingenious or the attractiveness of the beats etc. Prior to this, I had the mistaken overconfidence that I could selectively choose which songs I would allow to influence me. However, my views are changing after researching further and it’s an interesting process . . . more on that in a subsequent post. Basically, the song highlighted the main reason that triggered my decision to eliminate secular music. –Christina A.

Question 1: How do you feel about changing the words to a secular song and attempting to make it a gospel song? 

The Debate: 

Reclaiming for the Kingdom vs. Mixing Kingdom Business with the World

I don't agree with that, because it wouldn't make sense to do so. It’s a waste of energy and time. –Andrew P.

I don't think the categories of gospel vs. secular matter as opposed to the substance of the material. He could have rapped over any track, but the real question is what is he saying, what is his motivation, and is it glorifying God. I’m all for a God over money movement -Akua A.

I don't see anything wrong with changing the lyrics of the secular song to make it gospel. The only thing that’s really the same is the beat. For this case, I would think he chose the Ether beat because of the beef it symbolizes (JayZ vs Nas). And since he was beefing with those who were against God, it makes sense for him to choose this beat. As an artist, sometimes you chose a hot secular beat to rap over because the beat alone can get people’s attention, then once you get their attention you spit your fire and you got ‘em. –Jerry B.

I personally do not have a problem with secular music influencing gospel. I think it a way to get people to listen as long as there is a clear distinction. -Segun O.

I don't feel like believers need to be changing the lyrics of a secular song to send a message. What believers need to do is just ask for anointing to be creative and leave secular methods of propagating a message alone. –Eugene U.

I am not comfortable with changing the words of a secular song in order to try and make it a gospel song simply because the spirit that was used to create the beats and rhythms for the secular music is still going to be attached to that music even if you change the words. If the people who made the secular music were influenced by demonic forces in creating that music, then those forces are still attached to those beats. Plus God is a creative God. He created the world from nothing by the power of His words. If He is creative and we are made in His image, then we too can be creative and create new music for the Lord. Also, Scripture says "Sing unto the Lord a new song." –Kimberly G.

I actually like the idea of changing secular songs .I feel like we are taking back the songs that were supposed to be meant for glorifying the Lord anyway. On top of that, it helps bridge the gap with non believers and shows them that you can make nice tracks and praise Him at the same time. –Adebunmi A.

There is the debate between taking things back for the Kingdom and not mixing with the world. For the simple fact that there is a debate amongst Christians, it leads me to believe that people who are not Christians may not be able to readily distinguish and differentiate between the Kingdom song and the world song. The worldly or secular song came out first and so that is the version that naturally preempts the subsequent remixed versions. While listening to the remixed version, you will have no choice but to be reminded of the original version and its meaning and influences. –Christina A.

We have the Creator of ALL THINGS living inside of us as Christians. Why jack someone else's music when ours can come from the Originator. With that said...if you feel led to do it...let everything you do glorify God. He sees the heart and that's what really matters. As a musician, I wouldn’t do it though. -Tolu A.

Question 2: How do you feel about a gospel song/dance over a secular instrumental?

This I think is fine because I've done it before, from an artist point of view it keeps you sharp. It allows for you to try something new. I like rapping over secular beats because the beats themselves are great. –Andrew P.

Same way I feel about question 1. Be creative, stay in the light. –Eugene U.

If a gospel dance/song is over a secular instrumental, I am not down with that either for pretty much the same reasons as the first answer. –Kimberly G.

For songs it’s ok because you can communicate the change through the words. For dance it would have to be circumstantial. For instance, doing a praise dance to "All I do is Win" by DJ Khaled would be hard to get your point across but if you did a praise dance to Corinne Bailey Rae – “Like A Star” it would be acceptable. –Adebunmi A.

Our youth group dance ministry used to mix secular instrumentals with gospel songs. Thinking further, as far as the dance ministration over a secular instrumental goes, just because the words are absent does not mean the person you are attempting to minister to does not know the words and meaning of the original song. However, I see how an argument can be made for the gospel singer or rapper ministering (supra Andrew P. and Jehovah-vs-jay-hova blogpost by DTPro of Verbill Punishment). –Christina A.

There's more to music than the beats. I know of many musicians both popular and not who get their inspiration for music from many places other than the Holy Spirit. Some are even demonically influenced because of what they choose to practice. Some are on drugs when they make their music. In the book of Daniel (3:5), King Nebu (for short :P) declares, “that at the time you hear…all kinds of music you shall fall down and worship the gold image that King Nebuchadnezzar has set up and whoever does not fall down and worship shall be cast into the fiery furnace.”

He understood something that most don't. The power of music. Why didn't he just say, "when I give the word" OR "when I send my messenger to your town"? He understood the universality of music and how it can evoke emotion...in this case demonic emotions influenced by music to worship idols. (I've done a study on this and will post it on my blog soon toluakande.blogspot.com) -Tolu A.

Questions 3: How do you feel about an apparently gospel-influenced song by a mainstream secular artist?

Just because you are a secular artist does not mean they may not have a walk with God. It may be a very weak and childish walk but that relationship may manifest in the music from time to time. My take is that just because you make one Christian or gospel influenced song does not mean you’re excused from all the other nonsense you put out. Everyone is accountable for what they do, secular and non-secular alike. So in the end, if the song is a genuine song (which you can tell off bat), then cool, but I'm still holding you to the other stuff you do. -Andrew P.

What business hath light with darkness? A gospel-influenced song by a mainstream secular artist is but for business purposes. I'm all for entrepreneurial advancements but this very mix (gospel song-secular artist) right here, is a no no. -Eugene U.

I have no problem with that. Maybe that was a seed manifesting itself in that artist. Look at so many inspirational and gospel songs done by secular artist. If you remove the person and just listen to the song, don't you still end up praising Him? -Adebunmi A.

I do not listen to gospel influenced music by secular artists or gospel music where the gospel artists collaborate with secular artists. That is mainly because, as Christian's we are called to be in the world and not of the world. We are also called to live holy, or set apart for God. If a secular artist makes a gospel song, it is a confusing display for non-believers and believers alike and mixes the church with world when the church is called to be separate and holy. Plus, I'm not convinced that these secular artists are truly Christians. For example, Michelle from Destiny's Child made a gospel album, but then she was on the BET Awards after that giving a lap dance to Magic Johnson. That is not of Christ. And as for gospel artists, I do not listen to gospel artists who collaborate with secular artists or use secular producers and the like. I just think God deserves better than some stuff that has be mixed and tainted with people living lives that are anti-Christ, or against Jesus, and the spirits that are attached to that. And I don't need that in my spirit. –Kimberly G.

This doesn’t sit well with me since I’ve heard that one song, added to the end of the album, that’s usually not comparable in length and substance to the other songs. Meanwhile, the other songs on the album or from the artist completely contradict the content of this last apparently gospel-influenced track. Absent a judgmental spirit, this still has the tendency to produce confusion within any objective listener regardless of their religious conviction or lack thereof. However, if the target audience is the unsaved person, then it seems logical to use a person that an unsaved person would be listening to. –Christina A.

Quite frankly, God can use anyone to influence anyone. Many instances in the Bible where non believers have provoked, challenged or were used by God to change or influence believers. However, our source for any inspiration should be the Holy Spirit. It's just that sometimes the Holy Spirit uses people...both saved and unsaved. -Tolu A.

Thanks to Ademide, Jerry, Andrew, Akua, Segun, Eugene, Kim, Adebunmi, Daniel, and Tolu for their input.

listening?

I sent the message below and posed three discussion questions. The responses I've received are varied (almost as varied as the responses on worldstarhiphop). I'm gathering the responses and will share the viewpoints and include my response to the questions soon.

Subject: apathetic to the Jay-Z debate? . . . listen to this.

Please listen to this track carefully -- twice if you have to -- (and look at the images). If inclined, please let me know what you think about it and/or the questions below.

Also a few questions to think about–

1. How do you feel about changing the words to a secular song and attempting to make it a gospel song?
2. How do you feel about a gospel song/dance over a secular instrumental?
3. How do you feel about an apparently gospel-influenced song by a mainstream secular artist?

"Study the lie, they can make new lies up, study the truth and you'll know when the lie comes."

Where are we?

We left home early, so that just in case we hit traffic, we would still get there on time.

We were prepared.

Many of us were eager to enter on time. We, of course, also got the good parking spots.

While others are fashionably (or tactlessly -- whichever your perspective) late.

But better late than never, right? At least they made it!

Alas, everyone is here.

We see some familiar faces, some new.

Beautiful People, smelling good, looking good, brought their best foot forward.

Some dressed to impress.

Some came just for/as eye candy . . . (oftentimes referred to as spectators).

Some just came as they were, didn’t put much effort into their appearance.

Music is playing and it’s good music.

We like the music; the rhythm, the melody, the words.

We even sing along because we know all the words (or almost).

We’re dancing to the music, some people even break a sweat!

At times we start dancing with or near other people around us.

We are just so happy to be here, having a good old time.

People’s hands are lifted, stomping our feet, stepping to the music, clapping.

To be frank, we are glorifying the songs subject . . . because we can relate to it . . . or just because.

Smiling, Laughing, Merry, and Jolly.

We might consume something, we might not.

We might leave in the same way or state we came, we may not.

Lastly, we know we will probably drop some dollars when it’s all said and done. It's expected here, so we're okay with that. We're following the code of conduct, the rules.

Hours have passed but it’s like we don’t want it to end, ever.

A little saddened when it inevitably comes to an end, but we already know the next time we will be back.

We had a good time.

Where are we?

When this life ends, where were we and what were we doing?

To be continued…

teach me how to (agape) love

“Teach me how to love, show me the way to surrender my heart.” – Musiq

Recently, every now and then, that song, mainly that hook, found its way on my heart, and in my mind. It became more frequent over the last few days. I don’t know where it came from, I have not knowingly listened to that song in months, years possibly. This weekend I understood why.

Every message I received this past week centered on agape love. A very timely and relevant message I needed to receive.

God is Love and I was made for love. In order for me to progress and grow, to know the power and the anointing, and the promised ability to do all things, I need to be rooted and grounded in love. Without roots completely in the love of God “everything is just a religious display.” – Dr. Creflo Dollar

I need to attend to my roots. True story.

Earlier this summer, I almost missed an opportunity for development; developing unconditional love. I didn’t realize I was actually running away from it. Loving what is already lovely was easy, everyone likes good people; I do. When it came to the unlovely, I was being conditional.

“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.” – Carl Gustav Jung

Mistakenly, I believed I was consciously avoiding negativity and I was content with the status quo of this situation. These were basically conditional justifications, no less, of why I felt I did not have to love in this instance. Consequently, these conditions were placing hindrances on my development.

Walking in conditional love is not an option. I need to walk in unconditional, supernatural, agape love, All. The. Time; it’s mandated. I cannot choose when I will walk in love; it has to be everybody and anybody, whoever He places before me. I need to love what (who) is not as lovely, unconditionally. To love people in their weakness, because He unconditionally loves me, the way I am, undeserving and in my weakness.

“You get the richest measure of His Divine Presence on your life when you’re rooted and grounded in Love. And you become a body holy filled and flooded with God, Himself. Because when you’re rooted and grounded in love and you’re developing that love, you’re rooted and grounded in God and you’re developing in God.

And the more of that love you walk in, the more the Presence of God is going to be there. Because you can’t separate this love from God, because God is love. So Grow in Love. Grow in God. Grow in His Presence. Grow in His Anointing. Grow in His Blessings. Everything is going to start with the roots!” – Dr. Creflo Dollar

If I was made for love, I need my roots to be grounded in love, in order to make this love.

Please teach me how to love, like You do, Abba Father. Show me the way to surrender my love, unconditionally.

. . . two highlights from today

The church I went to today celebrates the couple when either spouse has a birthday. The couple comes up together and then they dance to the middle, for a minute. (interesting) Then the birthday celebrant stands while their spouse gives a testimony-type toast on their behalf.

So today the husband says some sweet things like “from now on your new nickname is Iya Beiji (mother of twins) because I know God is going to give us the twins that he promised us.” “I’m so glad we’re on this journey together.” Etc. etc. Aww. Okay but the real awww was the ending.

“If you live to be 100 years, I pray that I live to be 100 minus 1 because I don’t want to be without you.”

This statement works if they are the same age, (and besides the fact that this would make her a widow to mourn his home going while he is enjoying in Heaven, (just saying)) but we get the point.. . . awwwwww. *brownie points.* Maybe the twins will come sooner than we think.  On a side note, they looked so young!

Another side note:

You know a Nigerian woman is giving a testimony when she uses the phrase “dirty slap.”

During her testimony she says “I sent my son to Wal-mart and this white boy came out of nowhere and gave my son a dirty slap *** And so I want to thank God for safety.” End quote. I love it!

Familiar vs. Unfamiliar

Prior to relocating to Atlanta this summer, I sought out churches that had similar characteristics to the church I fellowship at in Chicago, Jesus House Chicago. I started looking as soon as I knew I was coming to Atlanta last year, but websites don't tell you everything about a church. So I started asking people too. I wanted to find that one perfect church for me and go there the entire summer. Then Pastor Isoken informed me that that's not how it's going to go down, in so many words of course. I would have to visit a few churches to get a feel for the right one for me.

And so I did that, literally (almost too literally). I visited a new church practically every week. The first week, I just picked a church, cold. It's been so long since I was a visitor. Then the following weeks, I accepted invitations or went with someone.

• City of David - Week 1
• Jubilee International - Week 2
• First Baptist Lithonia - Week 3
• RiverStone - Week 4
• Victory International - Week 5
• World Changers International - Week 5
• Jubilee International - Week 6
• International House of Prayer - Atlanta - Week 7
• Jesus House Chicago - Week 8

I appreciated experiencing different churches and seeing how they conduct different parts of the service. The opportunity to "church hop" does not come along frequently (or ever) when you're a member of a church and  have responsibilities in departments within the church. I was able to see what's going on outside of the not-so intentional but partly intentional comfort zone.

Ahh but last weekend, I went home! Fabulous time! It was great to see everyone. And likewise, I went to my home church. There really is no place like home. I've been going there since I was 12. And I feel the love every time I come back from any type of hiatus - school, internship away from home, etc. and even when I'm gone; messages, calls. It's like Cheers; everyone knows your name. I even took pics of different highlights and uploaded them onto facebook, kind of a like a groupie :) gosh!

So in that vein, along with a few other factors, I decided I would watch Jesus House Chicago livestreamed tomorrow.

I'm currently revisiting that decision since tomorrow is the First Sunday of the month, Thanksgiving Sunday, and Mama says (referencing the great Book) "do not forsake the fellowship of others." 

Well Sunday morning is quickly approaching and I'm at the same decision phase that I go through every Saturday night stroke Sunday morning that I've been here. I could either go to one of the aforementioned churches or pick a new church completely and inevitably be the visitor or the new[er] person with either decision.

But tomorrow I don't feel like being the visitor or the new[er] person. I just don't feel like it. *shrugs* I just want to get my praise and worship on and my lesson, Pastor B style. 

Now, it boils down to two options:

1) Virtual attendee of the Familiar vs. 2) Visitor to the Unfamiliar.

1) Safe route vs. 2) The unfamiliar route

To some people, it's just church, to me it's deeper, a little more complex and very symbolic of decisions to come.

To be continued . . .